Subway Talks

(The first half of this is completely true)

The train was crowded as usual. I sat (for a change) between two passengers, while a host of others stood crowded before us. We lurched through the tunnels, suddenly shuddering almost off track. The standing passengers gripped for dear life as they were thrown mercilessly.

One particular, well-endowed, woman was taken by surprise. Although she was hanging onto the pole, the force of the train was too much for her. She pivoted about the pole, swinging like a pendulum towards us. The hem of her skirt graced past my face, while the full weight of her derrière landed onto the man to my left. She momentarily pressed his head and chest against the subway.

Hastily, she pulled herself off the man, apologizing frequently. The man nodded sheepishly, his face the color of borscht.

I struggled to suppress my hysteria. I leaned over to the man by my side.

“That was worth two dollars, right?”

He gaped at me, his embarrassment growing.

Everyone needs a little bit of loving, I guess.

More talks to come…